The perfect meal
It is common to hear, read, or talk about a “perfect meal.” Everyone has an opinion, and that is perhaps what makes it both such an interesting and such a difficult topic. The perfect meal for one person might be unappealing and inedible to another. To one person, the perfect meal might not even be food dependent, but is be more effected by with whom and where it is eaten. Other people might feel that the food is the only part that matters. So when challenged to make my own perfect meal, the question was not actually the making a perfect meal, but deciding in the first place what the hell I consider to be a perfect meal.
It came down to two qualities. The first involved the food I would have to make, and in this regard it was easy enough to decide. The food would have to put forth a variety of flavors and at the same time be very satisfying. It would have to be first a meal that left you full and warm inside. Secondly, as for the feel of the meal itself, and who I ate it with, that took a little more thought. I grew up with a family that practiced a wonderful tradition: we ate together as a family. For me, there couldn’t be a lot of fuss and showiness. It had to be a simple meal, with the family, in a casual manner. And that is what I achieved, for more than one reason.
With this much decided, next up was the menu. I chose to ignore the synergy between foods. I am well aware that some foods go better with others; I just don’t particularly care about that myself. Food is food is food. With this in mind, I picked four very different and very good foods to have together. The first choice was easy- bread machine bread. I grew up with the stuff; it’s infectious and delicious scent, and wonderful fluffy warmth. Now it would be my turn to make it. Speaking of childhood favorites, my mind quickly turned to broccoli with melted cheese. This mix had been a long-standing favorite of mine, and also was healthy! Halfway there, I needed now only a dessert and a meat.
Picking which meat I would use for this meal was complicated. I’m a great lover of meat, and a self-proclaimed carnivore. Would it be tender pork chops, or simple and delicious chicken legs? There were far too many choices, so I decided to go in another direction: fish. With fish it’s much easier, since I really only like tuna and salmon, and salmon won out in the end. One more item, dessert. For the longest time I’ve enjoyed making dessert. Be it cookies or cake, it was one of the best parts of baking for me. When I found out we had a box of red velvet cake, I dropped the idea of making chocolate cake to try the red velvet, something I’d never made before. The menu was set. But a bigger question now loomed before me. It’s been a good while since I’ve last cooked. Would I be able to make this meal?
Once Friday came around, I rolled out of bed and got to work answering that rather scary question. It started early, as the bread machine bread takes a while to cook. I got a ride home and went about figuring out how to do this. For the longest time I’d considered the bread machine to be some big, complicated process. From what little I knew, making bread by hand was far from simple, and even with the aid of a machine, in this case, I thought it would be rough. I couldn’t have been more wrong. Much to my delight and enjoyment, it became a simple task. All that was needed was to add the ingredients: flour, yeast, water, salt, oil, and a few other things all put into the machine and then left to bake. There was a touch of disappointment that it wasn’t as complex as I thought, but that was easily overcome by the calming simplicity of it. I liked that it wasn’t some large arduous task to make such good bread, but instead an act that merely required a few moments, the right ingredients, and the will to do it.
Returning to college, I went through classes, my mind back on the bread churning away in the machine, being baked to perfection. That had gone smoothly enough, but what I was really worried about was the other three components. Broccoli can be touchy, and gross when over-cooked. Salmon burns easily, and I’d never attempted red velvet cake. It wasn’t long though, before I ended up confronting all three. But before I did, one other task remained. Upon returning home I pulled a fresh, warm, fluffy loaf of bread from the bread machine. One part down, three to go.
The cake came next, the mix asking for the usual suspects: eggs, water, and oil. I don’t use a set of beaters to mix batter; I do it by hand with a spoon. It takes longer, but just feels right. It’s while I’m mixing that I see something unusual. For those who haven’t had red velvet cake before, it’s called “red” velvet for a reason. I looked down and was stirring a mixture that was unsettlingly blood red. Into the pan the batter went, and into the oven the pan went. Better to not ponder on just what it looked like at that point. What came out of the oven was a fluffy, incredibly rich, dark red cake, which more then made up for its initial appearance.
The salmon was easier, thankfully, and less disturbing. It simply was plopped down into the pan, lathered with olive oil and broiled for ten minutes, poked and cut a bit, and then cooked for another ten or so. It was by far the simplest part of the meal to make. The broccoli on the other hand, was a bit more interesting. First, having washed and separated the pieces, I needed to cut and chop it into manageable bits. Being the adventurous soul that I am, I found the butcher’s cleaver and went to work. Despite the overkill of using that knife, it actually worked quite well, requiring only one or two quick chops. The cut broccoli was then tumbled down into the pan with some water, covered and left to cook. Timing here was essential, and at the critical moment, the pan was pulled from the heat. Now a rich, vibrant green, the broccoli was drained and put back into the pan, then mixed around with copious amounts of cheese and margarine. The meal was ready.
So then we sit, just my parents and I, with my sister away at a cake decorating class. She’s getting quite good at this art. The meal certainly didn’t disappoint. The bread was incredibly fluffy on the inside, and crunchy/crumbly on the outside. The salmon came out wonderfully, flavorful and soft, unburned in most places. Finally the broccoli mixed well with the cheese, making a tasty combination. One plateful fills me up with ease, thanks in part to the filling properties of the bread.
Last comes the cake, which is beautiful both in color and taste now. Thick, incredibly rich, and with a rather unique flavor, it requires little with it. Sitting back, very full, very satisfied, and very happy, I question myself. Is this what I wanted it to be? Was this meal indeed perfect? By the criteria I set it certainly was. It was homely, close and simple, eaten with just my parents and me. It filled us all right up, and offered several different and good tastes. Yet, more importantly for me, perhaps then any of those categories, I’d made it myself. I found then, sitting and resting after this perfect meal, that what made it more than just a good meal was that I’d made it myself and shared it with my family. That pride in having managed to cook an entire meal, with the instruction and help of my parents to be sure, but still, to have cooked it myself, was wonderful. A sense of responsibility and pride, these spices made the meal perfect.
You have a lot to work with from this first draft Jake! -I like that you included good descriptions of your food and explained the process of choosing what might be "perfect" for you. It also worked well for you to set up your criteria at the beginning and assess the outcome with your conclusion...
ReplyDeleteSuggestions: Homely means plain or ugly... I think you mean homey in that last paragraph? Maybe not a huge thing, but makes a big difference!
I also think that it would be good for you to show more of the cooking-things-yourself process and your family. Because these are the reasons you call the meal a success, it would be good to see them play out through the piece. It took a while for me to recognize that you went home for this meal and that you were having it with your family. Talk about why? Maybe talk about how not having your sister there impacted the feel of it?
[Another weird thing: broccoli with margarine and cheese isn't really healthy... right?]
-as for your questions: I would say more tension could benefit the work, probably, and there are parts that could be condensed to make it stronger, but the current length didn't distract--it flowed well.
I agree with Kelsey, I thought that the length of the piece worked well, I thought it flowed well. Your descriptions before, during, and after were good too.
ReplyDeleteMore information about location and movement would help me feel exactly where you are. I was confused about where you were preparing, cooking, and eating various parts of your meal.
In the last four or five paragraphs, you use passive voice more than seems necessary. Instead of saying "the pan was pulled from the heat", maybe something more active like "I yanked the pan out of the heat". That gives everything a more vivid and active feel. I remember that you did that intentionally in your last piece to heighten a sense of calm and peace but I'm not sure if it works better than an active description of a kitchen and cooking. I think the active voice works better with the hustle and bustle of cooking a big meal.
Jake
ReplyDeleteNice food descriptions! I like that your perfect meal consisted of four foods that you enjoyed and that tasted different—not necessarily “complementary” foods.
I was a little confused about where you were when you made the bread—did you go home to make it and then return to classes? Is home close by for you? How did you get there/back? How much time did you have? When did you wake up and when did classes start? What class were you in when you thought about your bread? (These details might provide more tension, especially if you were in a time crunch). I’m also curious—how did you decide what order to make your dishes in?
I like that you let the readers in on your thought processes—from first deciding what a perfect meal even is, to finally examining if it met your expectations. Maybe if you described your parents a little more—or maybe if you played up the difference between food experiences at home as opposed to college—it would add a few more interesting tensions and dimensions to the piece.
Jake, you have a lot to work with here. I loved that you came right out and stated that your dishes weren't necessarily going to compliment each other, but that they were just four foods you think are really good. Your descriptions were nice and gave me a clear idea of what you were eating.
ReplyDeleteAs with the other readers, length wasn't an issue for me. I noticed with your last piece as well that your writing has a bit of a hypnotic quality that relaxes and carries me through to the end. That being said, it could use a bit more action. I think Max's suggestion about active voice was really helpful. You may be able to give the piece more energy this way, and make it more engaging for the reader.
Like Julia said, I was confused about your travel between home and class. At first I thought you were skipping classes to cook, but then it seemed like home must be close by. Giving us a better idea of place in the piece would be really helpful. Great start, Jake.
I like how you started the piece, by working out what a perfect meal even is, and then getting into the whole dilemma of finding out what your perfect meal is. I'm also super jealous that you got to eat red velvet cake this weekend!
ReplyDeleteI see how more tension would help this, but I also understand how that would be difficult to do, seeing as how the event was actually pretty calming and easier than expected. Maybe build it up more at the beginning, before you even start making it?
Length was not an issue for me.
I think you have a great start! I liked reading your decision process and there aren't any major steps missing--it's very thorough! I was also confused about the school to home transitions but that's an easy fix. I think you could definitely add more tension...maybe add it at the end? The length is fine for your first draft, I wouldn't worry too much about that!
ReplyDeleteGreat first draft, Jake! The length of this piece works for me as well. You go through each step of this process very carefully and logically, and I think it works really well.
ReplyDeleteI would also like to see more about your parents' reactions, or more about your sister. We get to see that she's getting good at her cake decorating so it seems that she has an interest in food too! You also mention that your parents helped you along the way; maybe add more about at which specific points they helped you, or why you needed the help.
Great start!
I agree with everything everyone has said, so I'll try to add something different. I do think the length works and it flows really well. I would, however, like to see some more of the "characters" in your story (by characters, I mean your family...as Nora says, what were their reactions?) You say that your perfect meal is with your family, so I would really like to get to know them a little! Inserting some of that in between your descriptions of making the food would keep the flow.
ReplyDeleteThe descriptions and narration of the events work quite well, as everyone else has already pointed out.
ReplyDeleteI would like to see a more "to the point" introduction, the first paragraph could be done without.
Jake,
ReplyDeleteI'm really interested in your decisions to make things that may have been difficult or new for you, could you go into more depth on why that was the right choice? Why that made your meal perfect? Perhaps because it came with an additional feeling of accomplishment.
How close do you live to school that you can go home twice in a day and still attend classes?!
I must say that I would like to see more people in this piece: How old is your sister? Would she be impressed or disappointed by your velvet cake? Even if she wasn't there, she can still be a part of your story.
It's a good first draft, and certainly an enjoyable read, but it could stand to be a little more exciting.
Jake,
ReplyDeleteI like your introduction into the meal. I appreciated the thought and effort you put into your ultimate decision. This being said, I bet you could trim it down a bit. You may be able to sum up some of your thoughts and feelings into a two or three paragraphs, which would help you shorten the piece if that is what you’re interested in doing.
I found it interesting that you felt the need for meat as a major part of your meal. I would agree with this notion! Also, I found it interesting that you felt the need to make a dessert. This is something many others could have easily left out, and I’m glad part of your efforts went toward this final and wonderful touch!
As a suggestion, I’d go back and reread to make sure your use of tense throughout the piece remains constant.
Great start Jake, can’t wait to see where you take this piece!